She wasn’t there among us and most of us didn’t know. Her name was announced and yet no one appeared for the handshake. Everyone applauded at first but slowly stopped. John Taylor continued to say that she had died before the completion of her studies in a car accident. Everyone’s heart sank. John resumed by saying that her brother would be receiving her certificate in her place and a young man appeared on stage. The loudest of applauses shook the room. The real kind. The kind that you can feel deep inside and which moves your heart.

No one would stop clapping and no one wanted to. It was important that she heard us where she was and I bet she did.

To you, Jess, in celebration of your life, I want to dedicate my own graduation. I wish you were there with us yesterday. I didn’t know you but I’d love to have met you. You will always be remembered and missed.

I received some bad news last week. My mum has been having some very bad headaches lately. She has been taking pain killers but they would always come back. I have asked her, nay, begged her to go see a doctor. She never did. She kept saying she would but never actually arranged to go. I am very much like my mother. I take after her in more than one ways especially personality-wise. I do not go to doctors. I know I should and I keep saying I will but I end up never going. Exactly like my mother.

Last week the headaches got pretty bad and my dad took her to see a doctor. The tests showed a tumour. That was the bad news. The good news were that the tumour was benign. It is a lipoma which is nothing more than fatty tissue which is normally left untouched unless there are cosmetic reasons to remove it. In the case of my mother however the lipoma is pressing against a nerve (or possibly more than one) in her head which is causing the headaches and from what I understand the nausea she was experiencing last week as well.

Today, of all days, she was admitted to hospital. She is having a lot of tests done one of which requires her to not move. I am not exactly sure what it is but she was injected with some drug which requires her being as still as possible until tomorrow when the test will be done. She is spending Mother’s Day in a bed. She has to remain still and is not going to sleep because of that. But that, for me, is not the worse thing.

The worse thing is that she is alone. I am not there because I can’t be there. She is too far away for me to visit. I am close to tears because I can’t be there for her. There’s nothing I can do about it and it’s killing me. A phone call is not enough but it’s all we have right now. I tried to be strong on the phone and as cheerful as possible. The last thing she needs is a boy crying over the phone right now. I laughed and joked and did my best to give her as much strength as possible. People have told me this is not a dangerous procedure and that I shouldn’t worry but all this means nothing because the truth is I am too scared of losing her. She is my strength and my idol. She has done too much for me. She has done things I cannot even imagine myself being able to do in her position. You know what the first thing she said on the phone was? That she’s sorry but it looks like she won’t be able to be here for my finals. She is the most powerful person I know and I can only wish to be half the person she is.

Mum, I love you.

I love you more than words can express and more than actions can show. I wish I could be there with you.

Blog Action Day is approaching fast. In almost a month from today thousands of people will be blogging for one cause. This year’s important issue that will be discussed is the environment. Every blogger will be able to “Post about the environment in their own way and relating to their own topic. Our aim is to get everyone talking towards a better future.”

Everyone, no matter of nationality or background, will be able to join in either by:
“Publishing a post on their blog which relates to an issue of their own choice pertaining to the environment. For example: A blog about money might write about how to save around the home by using environmentally friendly ideas. Similarly a blog about politics might examine what weight environmental policy holds in the political arena. Posts do not need to have any specific agenda, they simply need to relate to the larger issue in whatever way suits the blogger and readership. Our aim is not to promote one particular viewpoint, only to push the issue on the table for discussion. So write in whatever way suits your readers and your blog, just relate it back to the environment and make sure it goes up on October 15th.”
or by:
“Posting a banner on their site (http://blogactionday.org/promote) or by donating their day’s blog earnings to an environmental charity of their choice.”

I will be there and hopefully so will you.

My grandparents celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary last night. They recieved a letter from Liz who is also having her diamond wedding anniversary this year. Liz actually had a commemorative coin minted to celebrate!

Their Bridesmaid still has her wedding dress (but she didn’t wear it last night). When quizzed on what made their marriage last so long they disclosed that it was always saying ‘yes dear’ no matter what the other said.

Sorry about the rambling post, I’m recovering from the open bar still.

I think I’m starting to date someone. I’m at the akward stage in the first week where you meet a few times and neither of you know each other well enough yet to decide if you’re going to be friends or more.

Ohh, and we hade Elvis come in to film something at work for TV and I wasn’t invited to watch. Ohh well, no excuse to skipping uni then.

Well I just thought I’d check in and wish everyone a safe and happy Easter. I just hope you remember the real meaning of Easter, that bilbies give birth to chocolate eggs and that rabbits are pests that should be killed and eaten whenever possible.

Irony: Alcohol is not sold in Australia two days of the year, Good Friday and Christmas day, the two days we drink the most.

Today at 16:03 I ceremoniously lit my last cigarette. The event was held on the side walk outside the building where I work and was witnessed by a group of 7 people who were passing by at the time. It was more of a “let’s get this over with” kind of thing and didn’t particularly enjoy smoking it. In the same way that I haven’t enjoyed the last few cigarettes I have smoked over the past week. It was not a matter of dreading or anticipating of my quitting but more of the fact that I hardly ever enjoy smoking. It has always been more of a nervous habit for me than anything else; something to keep my hands occupied and something to take my mind away from my insecurities.

Today at 16:03 I reluctantly decided to stop hurting myself just because I was lazy and stand up tall enough to face it. I am not a coward and I am not weak. I have been through some really hard things and I refuse to accept that a cigarette is of any importance next to all these things.

Today at 16:03 that packet was empty for the last time and I know this will not be easy.

Until further notice, any extra cigarettes will be considered just that; extra. I’m on overtime if you will, while I phase this cancer out of my life for good. Hopefully try #4 will be the good one; the one that sticks.

As you all already know, unless you’ve spent your day in a coma, today is Pancake Day (officially called Shrove Tuesday). All day people talk about pancakes, then make pancakes, then eat pancakes, then talk about pancakes and so on. It is like all of the sudden everyone gets sucked into the same obsessive compulsive behaviour!

“Must eat pancakes or Britney Spears will shave everyone’s hair off in her path!”

Yes, originally Shrove Tuesday was all about confessing sins and whatever but I think the British haven’t thought this through very well. The Latin people have it right. If you’re going to confess your sins and go mouth first into a 40-day fasting period then you need to have a heck of a party first! You will dress up and dance in the streets, you will get so drunk you forget you have legs (or even worse; a spouse and kids). And if you don’t want to get dressed then wear as little as possible and you’ll fit right in. After you burn half your brain cells from all the drinking, dancing and lack of sleep you can go and confess the few things you remember doing then have a hangover for 40 days while your liver gets a well deserved holiday.

I think I’d like my belated Carnival season now please.

Hello, my name is Adrian and I’m a friend of Colin’s. I’m too lazy to write my own blog, so Colin has graciously allowed me to start writing in his in the hopes that between us we can write something here almost yearly. Today is a particularly auspicious day for me, as an Austraylian, to begin writing, for no doubt you are all aware, it’s Australia day! Australia Day for Australians is usually the day we salute the flag, shoot and eat the animal on our coat of arms, chuck beer on ice, prawns on the BBQ, and infants in the croc pool.

We Australians are a free nation of blokes, sheilas and the occasional wanker. We come from many lands (although a few too many of us come from Neu Zulland), and although we live in the best country in the world, we reserve the right to bitch and moan about it whenever we bloody well like. So let me tell you about this big brown land and educate your foreigners.

We want to make “no worries mate” our national phrase, “she’ll be right mate” our national attitude and “Waltzing Matilda” our national anthem (so what if it’s about a sheep-stealing crim who commits suicide, he was obviously going to VOTE LAMB). We’re the best in the world at all the sports that count, like cricket, netball, rugby league and union, AFL, roo shooting, two up and horse racing. We also have the biggest rock, the tastiest pies, and the worst dressed Olympians in the known universe. Only in Australia can a pizza delivery get to your house faster than an ambulance. Only in Australia do we have bank doors wide open, no security guards, or cameras but chain the pens to the desk. Stand proud Aussies - we shoot, we root, we vote. We are girt by sea and pissed by lunchtime.

First, there is Victoria, a state named after a queen who didn’t believe in lesbians. Victoria is the realm of Armani turtlenecks, Melbourne Macchiatto, AFL grand final day, and big horse races. Its capital is Melbourne , whose chief marketing pitch is that “it’s liveable”. At least that’s what they think. The rest of us think it is too bloody cold and wet.

Above Victoria is New South Queensland, home of the Telstra Dome, an Olympic stadium built by the government, the same government that charged its self billions of dollars to rename the stadium, after another part of the government. Its mascots are Bondi lifesavers that pull their Speedos so far up their cracks to keep the left and right sides of their brains separate.

Down south we have Tasmania, maps of the little state bring smiles to the sternest faces because it looks like a set of well trimmed genitals. It holds the world record for a single mass shooting, which the Yanks can’t seem to beat no matter how often they try.

South Australia is the province of red wine, a festival of foreigners and bizarre axe murders. SA is the state of innovation. Where else can you so effectively reuse country bank vaults and barrels as in Snowtown, just out of Adelaide (also named after a queen) as a mortuary to host the bodies of those your axe has cleeved in vats of acid?

Western Australia is too far from anywhere to be relevant. WA was the last state to stop importing convicts and many of them still work there in the government.

The Northern Territory is the red heart of our land. Outback plains, sheep stations the size of Europeon nations , kangaroos, Jackaroos, emus, Uluru… Its creek beds have the highest aluminium content of anywhere too. Although the Territory is the centrepiece of our national culture, few of us live there and the rest prefer to fly over it on our way to Bali.

And there’s Queensland . While any mention of God seems silly in a document defining a nation of half arsed sceptics, it is worth noting that God probably made Queensland, as its beautiful one day and perfect the next. Why he filled it with drongos remains a mystery. Queensland is the only Australian state without daylight savings, making it one hour and twenty years behind the rest of the country.

Who could forget New Zealand? Where the men are men, the women are men and the sheep are very, very afraid. Sheep outnumber people in New Zealand, mostly because there are no people in New Zealand, just tourists and Kiwis.

Oh yes and there’s Canberra. The less said the better. Capital of the nation, home of pornography and illicid drugs. This bastion of our democracy, albeit a democracy so flawed that a redneck, gun toting political party can get a million votes and still not win one seat, is the home of more prostitutes than any other city in the nation.

So it is that I will leave you with not the Prime Miniture’s address to the nation, but an address from an Australia Day Party, where the beer flows freely, the BBQs are fired up, and Midnight Oil has political representation on a Federal level:

My fellow Australians, in this election year, we are faced with a stark choice: allow un-Australianism to flourish, or take a stand against it, before it becomes as prevalent as exposed genitals on a reality television show. I love Australia, her far horizons, her jewelled sea, the Aussie people and our Australian way of life. In the past year, I’ve travelled all over this wide, brown land. I’ve met a few people, both young and old, and listened to what they had to say. I’ve seen first-hand the devastation un-Australianism has caused. And frankly, I’ve had a gutful.

Don’t be unAustralian. Vote Lamb on Australia Day. You know it makes sense.

On a well removed note, Colin suggested that I list a daily fact about myself here so here we go: I once pissed on a cat.

It is my birthday today and I’m in such a great mood even though it’s my first day back at work after the Christmas holidays. I am 21 today!

It’s been a great journey so far and I am grateful for this. I want to thank my family and all my friends (there’s so many of you) for giving me all these great memories so far.

Also the New Year has arrived complete with a New Year Resolution (to come), added optimism and an appetite for new adventures.

Plus it’s finally legal for me to drink in the States as well!