It’s almost 6am here and I can’t fall asleep. Insomnia has kicked my ass again. I tried but it didn’t work. I just can’t sleep tonight. There are thoughts in my head tonight and lots of them. I accidentally played a song that made me reminisce about when things were simpler and I had no cares in the world.

Uni coursework was not an issue and even if it was I didn’t seem to care about it. I didn’t have a boyfriend and I didn’t mind. I was out having fun and enjoying myself as often as I could. It was my second year in Brighton and I had just come out of an almost year-long depression. I just let everything go and had fun. But you see, things were going very well for almost a year and that doesn’t sit well with my karma.

After finally feeling free to enjoy myself, finding the right friends to hang out with and eventually finding a boyfriend things started going downhill. I started having very big problems with my housemate, had a bad break-up and I decided to slow down. Actually, it was a combination of a decision and other factors like getting back to studying and finally finding a part time job where I worked on a regular basis and not just once a month. Being the emotional person that I am, the break-up had affected me more than I wanted to admit. I stopped going out as often. I did not want to meet anyone new. I was only interested in making new friends and it was enough. It actually fulfilled me and I didn’t feel I was missing anything but things were not as great as the year before.

Since then, things have been slowing down even more and lately they’ve come to a screeching halt. However, I know that everything will get better. I have to believe this otherwise the depression will get so bad I won’t be able to get out of bed again. I sound worse than I feel and I hate it. I am a happy person and I can’t stand to see myself break down or get depressed about small things.

To use the lyrics of the song; I will always get up after a nosebleed and I will jump into puddles again.

Hey, look! It’s raining outside!

I give you Hoppípolla by Sigur Rós: (I am putting the video before the audio because the video makes the song even better and you should definitely watch it)

Update: I have replaced the old video I had with the HQ version of it. It was a bitch to get it to embed but I found a hack for it and you can now enjoy it in it’s full glory (well at least fuller than before).

Audio and Lyrics after the bump…

Audio:

Lyrics for Sigur Rós’s Hoppípolla:
(for the English translation please scroll down)
Icelandic:
Brosandi
Hendumst í hringi
Höldumst í hendur
Allur heimurinn óskýr
nema þú stendur

Rennblautur
Allur rennvotur
Engin gúmmístígvél
Hlaupandi í okkur
Vill springa út úr skel

Vindurinn
og útilykt af hárinu þínu
Ég lamdi eins fast og ég get
með nefinu mínu

Hoppípolla
(Í engum stígvélum)
(Allur rennvotur)
Rennblautur
(Í engum stígvélum)

Og ég fæ blóðnasir
En ég stend alltaf upp

Við sjáumst tvö
Í sjálfum mér

Og ég fæ blóðnasir
En ég stend alltaf upp

Við sjáumst tvö
Hoppípolla

English translation:
Smiling
Spinning round and round
Holding hands
The whole world a blur
But you are standing

Soaked
Completely drenched
No rubber boots
Running in us
Want to erupt from a shell

Wind in
An outdoor smell of your hair
I hit as fast as I could
with my nose

Jump into puddles
(completely drenched)
(With no boots)
Soaked
(completely drenched)

And I get a nosebleed
but I always get up

We see each other
In myself

And I get a nosebleed
but I always get up

We see each other
jump into puddles

Related posts:
mondayz tunez #16 :: take it like a man baby
mondayz tunez #13 :: slow down you’re gonna crash
mondayz tunez #15 :: electric blue for me
mondayz tunez #20 :: one of the many songs we both like
mondayz tunez #17 :: accidental success

Written by Colin Brooks on 21.04.08 at 4:45 am.